I will admit I feel a bit haphazard in my identity as a mother.  Part of me feels like I’ve reverted back to high school and I have to figure out which cafeteria table of moms I have to sit with.  And that is ridiculous because it reflects an obvious insecurity and lack of maturity which I should have since I have a baby…

 is what people who are judgmental would say.

The thing is, I was really thrown into this.  I got pregnant while on birth control.  I had a 10oz grand marnier martini the day before I took my pregnancy test.  I was not walking the path to motherhood, in fact I was only dating J’s father for three months!  But now that I am a mother, I love being a mother, but I am also having a severe identity crisis because I feel like I don’t have a posse.  I don’t have my Samantha Jones to talk to about sex or Miranda Hobbes to talk to about having a son.  Most of my friends are five years younger than me and single, but I’m definitely the only parent.  My cell phone used to ring off the hook, but now I’ve been put aside like last season’s Louboutins.  You really recognize who your real friends are after you have a baby.

So here is the community of “mom bloggers”.  I am a mom, and I am blogging.  So does that make me a mom blogger?  Yes.  But after googling “mom blog” (which, by the way, has a really ugly aesthetic ring to it), I found a plethora of sites I wanted to join…  but I don’t quite… fit… in?  However, I am a mom!  So how does that make sense?

It brings up something that I’ve been thinking about ever since I was pregnant.  Society definitely smears this outfit onto women when they have children.  There’s the MILF fantasy, or mothers are pear shaped and non-sexual, we are also put under microscopes, having their every action judged as to whether it was a good decision in its effect towards baby.

I don’t want to pigeonhole myself as a mom blogger, although I think it’s important to point out that I am a mother.  I am a mother and I still like fashion as I always have.  I still love writing as I always have ever since I was in kindergarten and stapled my own newsprint books together.  I was even chosen to read my first one on Michigan NPR back in ‘86.  These things are just me and who I am.

When I write about fashion, I’m a woman who also happens to be a mother, writing about fashion.  Sometimes it will pertain specifically to mother-esque things:  like ditching a diaper bag for instance.  But sometimes I’ll write about a pair of shoes and you will not see the mention of the word “baby” in the article.  And that’s that.  It doesn’t mean I’m not a mother in that moment.

This entry was posted on Thursday, April 3rd, 2008 at 7:30 am and is filed under Lifestyle. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.